A blog about life - the good, the bad, the people, the books, the games, coffee, and food.

Friday, 18 July 2014

Thursday, 17 July 2014

It all seems to be

This never ending chase. It feels like we're just chasing after the next milestone. Doing what we can to help him achieve the next thing. It's like a never ending cycle of "What comes next?" First there was the smile, then the moving on to slightly longer stretches of sleeping, then rolling and sitting, and laughter, and solids, and and and. And the one thing that is really supposed to be a big help, and normalise things - or at least remind you that you're not alone, and others wonder the same thing you do - isn't helping.

Suddenly those others parents and their babies have you questioning what you're doing, what your baby is achieving. And it's just so hard not to compare, and not to feel judged. And then you realise that it'll never end. There'll always be something...and that it needs to stop. But how do you make it stop? Not talking to others isn't going to help anybody.

Is this just another form of the constant competition that people find themselves in? It seems to me that we're all always in a form of competition. Conversations seem like areas of one-upmanship: it's either my good day is better, or my bad day is worse, or I'm so busy. Or is this just something that only I see, and I only see it because of insecurity pushing me to see how I'm not worthy because I don't do x?

Clearly I'm still grappling with the Brene Brown talk. Which is also peculating in there with a new blog find - renegade mothering; in particular this and this. Is anything I just said making sense to anyone else; or is it just another stranger thought tangent my mind takes?


Tuesday, 15 July 2014

It's all changed

Gaming as I knew has come to an enormous screeching halt. Gone are the days of 4 -6 hour long rpg sessions. Gone are the days of sitting, and hacking and slashing our way through a dungeon. Hours of creating the perfect sim for my schadenfreude moments.

It's all gone. Hopefully just for a little while. But on Sunday it hit me in a big way. I can't do a quick four hour pfs game anymore. Keiden won't be happy to play on his mat or sit on my lap and watch people anymore. When he was younger we managed to pull it off, but now it's just not going to happen.

I'm so afraid that with stopping I'll just not get back to it. But we can still pull off the occasional two hour session for home games - and aps. So there's hope.

There's more hope in that Jerall found a cute game - Divinity - that we can play together for an hour or so at night. And that's the thing, without being able to game together my real fear is that my relationships will change for the worse. Gaming together has been a big part of what Jerall and I do together for fun. It's also what we do predominantly with most of our friends.

I suppose this will be the real test of those friendships. Besides gaming will the shared food, coffee and geeky interests survive?

This part of the parenting gig is hard.

Monday, 14 July 2014

Boot camp is over...for now

The topics have become uninspiring. The one for today is "my parents", and tomorrow's one is a free. I'll be pausing boot camp until a topic grabs me. When one does, I'll do the backlog of topics. I found that the caching-up I did went far smoother than the daily writing. It could be because there's more pressure with doing a batch of posts at a time than just one. Either way writing by route is not for me.

Sunday, 13 July 2014

Saturday, 12 July 2014

Thoughts on writers boot camp

Right now I'm becoming irritated with the boot camp. One word topics, and topics that have been used in other challenges aren't really helping me to write. But, it is helping me get back into a habit of writing, and posting more often. It has though, become a form of writing by route.

Although is that a fault of the boot camp, or just my own inability to run off with the topic on an interesting or different tangent? Either way as I ponder that, I will finish it. I'm working on finishing more things, rather than starting and just leaving them.

If the posts are irritating you, just remember that they'll end at the end of the month ;).

Writers Boot Camp Day 12: What makes me laugh


  1. Lame jokes - my favourites include: How do you get a baby austronaut to sleep? You rocket. What's brown and sticky?  A brown stick.
  2. Puns - the sillier the better.
  3. Jerall - the teller of lame jokes and maker of puns.
  4. Keiden - him laughing or just doing cute baby stuff.



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If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Writers Boot Camp Day 11: One food, one drink for the rest of my life

I could happily eat sushi every day for every meal.


Rooibos tea ftw! I have this mug in blue.


**I'm playing catch-up.

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If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Writers Boot Camp Day 10: The best advice I ever received/heard

This topic irritates me. The best advice really? Any advice that you decide to take and use is clearly the best advice for you at that time.

Advice that I'm currently taking on board and using in some form or another:

  • Trust your instinct
  • Relax
  • Embrace the mommy guilt  - don't let it become overwhelming, but realise that you feel the guilt because you care immensely.
  • Cut out grain and sugar.



**I'm playing catch-up, life happened.

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If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Wednesday, 9 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 9: Pinings


I long to read. More accurately I long to read physical  books. Reading on a device is just not the same as reading something with heft. I long to just be able to sit and read for as long as I like. I miss being able to read late - these days late seems to be 22:00. I long to not feel too tired to give a book the attention it deserves. I miss the quiet that comes when you're immersed in another world.

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If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.


Tuesday, 8 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 8: A love letter to my pet hate

Dear random lady,

I do so love how you think it's okay to come up to me and invade my bubble of personal space to touch my baby. My baby that I'm wearing (that's carrying my baby in a wrap). It's such fun when you ignore my oft repeated "Please don't touch my baby" to just carry on reaching out your hand till I'm forced to bat it away.

Truly there is nothing I love more than answering your dumb-ass question as to why I don't want your dirty, stranger hand touching my baby. Clearly I've missed that vital study that said the best thing you can do for your baby is have a stranger touch him; especially when it means they get to invade your space too.

See you soon, germ bubble.
Me

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If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Monday, 7 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 7: Inspired by art


It's just a reminder of the days long gone. Days of reading late, fighting your eyelids as they and the book become heavier and heavier. But you must, no you need to carry on...something exciting is happening to the character...and how can you just abandon this new found friend. Read you must, if you don't the story just pauses, frozen in that one spot, at that inopportune moment. And when you do sleep it'll be dreams filled with all those tiny fascinating details that burrowed their way into your mind...to be completely explored in dreams.
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If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Sunday, 6 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 6: Doors and windows

I just love unusual, and colourful doors and windows. Most of one of my boards on Pinterest has just glorious pictures of wonderful windows and doors. So this post will be pretty close to wordless. Enjoy :).



















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If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Saturday, 5 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 5: Find a job ad in the paper. Write about your life if you had that job.

We don't buy the newspapers often, and this week's community paper got destroyed in the rain. So I opted for the next best option - I went to Biz Community and am using the first job ad for Cape Town that I saw.

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Hmmm my life as a direct account executive is crazy. For one I don't have much time during the week to see my husband or son, sometimes there aren't even weekends. The relentless push to make sales target is driving me batty. Not to mention the effect on my health - tension headaches, chest pains, backache and my weight just keeps on climbing. There's no time for good food when you're going from one coffee to the other meeting potential and current clients. On the plus side the money means my hair constantly looks good. Although I've become more materialistic -  you must dress for success.

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This topic  is pretty hard. And it's clear that I don't have a very clear or good impression of what it is that account executives do besides try to get sales. It'll be very interesting reading what other people come up with.

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If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.


Friday, 4 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 4: I just couldn't live without

Some of the blogs I read are also doing the boot camp, and most of them the answers for day three was losing their significant other. And for me that's what I just couldn't live without.

I can not picture what my life would be like without Jerall in it. Sometimes when  I'm particularly angry or grumpy with him I try to imagine him not around, and it just upsets me so much that I quickly deal with whatever lead to the anger or grump.

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If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Thursday, 3 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 3: One of my greatest fears

Today's topic is pretty easy. One of my greatest fears - albeit it is a new one -  is that I will fail as a parent. I'll have failed if Keiden turns into one of those annoying males blind to the privilege that being male grants. I'll also have failed if he doesn't remember that everyone has a story/their struggles. Pretty much if we don't get it right for him to treat everyone he deals with fairly and politely then we've failed.

How will I know that we got it right; he'll treat cold calling call centre agents politely.

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If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.


Wednesday, 2 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 2: My 5 favourite words in English (or any other language)

For some reason thinking of 5 words is throwing me for a loop, which is weird given how much I love reading. I'm just going to go with what ever pops into my head first.
  1. Daijoubu - it's more a phrase, but it is one of the few words I picked up from watching tons of anime that sticks with me, and it both asks and answers a question.
  2. Foeterasie - it's an Afrikaans word that covers a person's fondness for all the finicky details. I find that Afrikaans can be incredibly beautiful and descriptive language, and this word covers its descriptive nature wonderfully.
  3. Monkey - a pet name J and I throw around for each other, and Keiden.
  4. Yay - it's a word that can convey a lot, or t least in the way that I use it. And it's just so happy.
  5. Insidious - it was part of my preferred phrases to mutter to myself when dealing with the unpleasantness that was high school. I'd always wimp out of actually calling someone insidiously asinine, but just knowing that there were a few people I could call that, and not have them know what I was saying helped.
Looking at this list it's very clear that I am indeed a very strange fish ;).

If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Tuesday, 1 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 1

In a bid to post more often I'm following a group on twitter, @writersbootcmp that posts a daily topic for you to write about; which you need to do in 60 minutes. Day one's topic is: Even if you know me well you don't know this.

Hmmm it's a bit tricky, but I'll go for short and sweet. Even those who know me really well don't really know how hard I find social situations. I'm so good at faking it, till I make it that it's probably a big surprise to realise that I'm shy. It's a shyness that stems from insecurity...I'm not interesting/smart/funny enough for someone to want to talk/interact with me.

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Me in a nutshell: I game, read, tweet, enjoy good food, have bouts of red pen rage and I'm a coffee snob.

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