A blog about life - the good, the bad, the people, the books, the games, and coffee.

Tuesday, 23 December 2014

Friday, 5 December 2014

Five for Friday: Random Thoughts

  • I'm learning lessons about eating from Keiden's adventures with eating. Basically; slow down, take your time and enjoy it. It's only from watching him, that I realised I'd lost the art of savouring my food.
  • We had a reality check on just where all the expendable income went pre-baby. We traded in a lot of games to get Dragon Age: Inquisition. It was scary that we had enough to get the game outright. 
  • Thesis submission season is a major energy drain. I've gotten a lot of last minute requests - by last minute I mean requests 10 days before submission. Somehow the impression exists that editing is quick and easy.
  • I miss wearing dresses. It's currently topping my list of downsides to breastfeeding.
  • I'm trying to find easy, delicious mini breakfast eats - it's my Christmas day eats responsibility - so point me to any you love please.

Friday, 28 November 2014

Five for Friday

  • I've sort-of started a project to print and potentially frame some photos. I call it Project Frame, but I think I might do some photo-books, and faceblocks from PrintWild. I've started with Keiden's first pic out my tummy, and one of Jerall and I on his 21st. The last photos I've printed before this were some from our wedding.
  • I have finally figured out what I'd like my clothing style to be. So it's a slow purge and shop for getting to that point. I'm aiming for not getting too many items of clothing too soon, especially because I'm still lugging around a lot of pregnancy weight.
  • I'm in loathe with my body, and can't quite get things right to fix it.
  • I am trying to be less grumpy about my body by at least dressing everyday. It's incredibly easy to just wear a frumpy t-shirt and shorts/leggings when you don't leave the house. I'm hoping by changing that I'll feel less blegh.
  • A crawling K has me cleaning spots that would only get tackled once a month, all the time now.

Monday, 24 November 2014

Catching up

It's been awhile...again. But I'll at least have managed a post a month. There's not much to say really, which I will take as a good thing.

A big moment for us though is Keiden has started to crawl. He has been doing so since Friday - yay him :). I'd been thinking that he might be one of those don't crawl babies, especially as he seemed content to bum hop everywhere.

No news on the buying a house front. We've put in offers twice now, & lost both times :-/.

I'm working on cutting out sugar again, & fixing my portion sizes. I feel like my eating has gotten out of hand, and I really want to be on top of it when my birthday arrives. Just under two months till 30 o_0.

I have ideas for posts, and am just not getting them out. So I clearly need to work on having a schedule of sorts and sticking to it. I'll see how it goes, as end pf the year fatigue has set in. And I'm only getting a week break - the week between Christmas and New Year.

How are you doing? How do you deal with end of the year fatigue?

Sunday, 26 October 2014

Breaking-up with a retailer is hard to do

First there was the packing of a leaky packet of meat on top of fresh strawberries - we excused it, new packer who made a mistake. Still tweeted about it, details taken, action and a phone call promised, but nothing happened.

Then there was ripen at home avos that went mouldy in a week. We thought, okay maybe there was something we could have done to not have that happen. But decided it's better to not buy fresh fruit and veg from them any more. Tweeted about it, details taken, action and a phone call promised, and yet again nothing happened.

Then yesterday we bought Kiri blocks on a fantastic special. Only to get home and discover that it was a fantastic special because they were selling three week old stock. Stock that I nearly fed my baby, but fortunately managed to notice the best before date on the box.

Yip, it says: BB 04 10 2014

Tweeted, and got the usual details please we'll look into it. This time I said you have it already, and I don't expect you to do anything because you haven't before.

It might just be me, but how many people check best before dates of things on special, besides milk? We place trust in our retailers, especially the big ones. But it's official Pick n Pay and I have broken up. It really is them, and not me.

Tuesday, 7 October 2014

I really, really hate sucking it up

About a month or so ago Keiden and I had hit a really good spot. Sure he was still waking up once a night, but it easy enough to deal with. Especially because we'd hit a workable routine, some days were still bad, but for the most part we had good days more often than not.

And then, I started to panic that I was overfeeding him/doing something wrong. Which was brought on by chats with other moms. And yes, I know you're not supposed to compare your baby to others. You show me someone who doesn't do this, and I'll show you a liar.

You do compare, just by chatting and keeping up with other parents you are comparing. For the most part it helps you have some sort of base for knowing if what you're doing is a reasonably good thing. But then you have moments where it really sucker punches you.

I got sucker punched hard.

So then I got all panicked about things. I work really well when I have a base set of rules and information to work with. A guide, that allows for me to go off and do my own thing, with the assurance that I have a baseline to return to. So for that reason I felt like I really hit my mommy groove with solids. Which made my worry about overfeeding Keiden this massive thing.

So last week we went to clinic. At which I got told that Keiden should be eating more, but because he's getting milk feeds in between meals he doesn't get hungry. And that that, and the process of teething are probably reasons why he isn't sleeping though. So that plus the paed saying at our six month visit that by nine months he should be down to four feeds I stopped breastfeeding him to sleep at nap time.

It has been a week of awful. The bedtime battles we were having before escalated, and nap time became an hour to an hour and a half fight that ended with him crying himself to sleep in my arms. And this because I was working with a guide.

Mandy has this great post about finding her mommy instinct. I'm not there. It's hard for me to not to have a base set of rules inform about 80% of what I'm doing. So now to add to my suck it up list this this jealousy of how she found her groove.

This is the thing, there is no way out of this dark hole I'm finding myself in other than sucking it up. And I really, really hate sucking it up. But I need to. Because all this fighting with Keiden is really turning each day into a massive struggle just to get through it.

I'm now so jealous of moms who work at an office. Working at home, with baby is just unbelievably hard. I would so love to have the clear delineation between work time, and doing stuff with my kid time.

It all jut boils down to being tired. I'm so tired of being the one with him all the time. Doing everything for him. There are two things I really need;  none of which I'll get. One a day just to sit and do nothing for anyone else. And the second, a good cry. Which requires that day because I get my best cathartic cries from watching the first two seasons of Greys Anatomy.

Now time to suck it up.

Tuesday, 23 September 2014

An update

  • I'm rereading The Bridgerton Series. Sometimes you just need light, fluffy and funny.
  • Keiden is full of beans. He's bum shuffling/hopping to the edge of his foam puzzle play area and then starts pulling it apart.
  • We're looking at buying a place.
  • Solids has gotten a lot easier now that Keiden is eating more, sometimes we even have the same lunch :). Although he had a reaction to aubergine...so we need to figure out a plan. The reaction has made me worry more when introducing him to new foods.
  • It is amazing watching him have new things. So far he tends to like most of what he's had, but his favourites are tuna and cheese. He tries to stuff two sticks of cheese in his mouth at the same time.

Friday, 5 September 2014

Five for Friday

  • It's so disappointing when the ending of a book series just doesn't deliver on all the promise it had in the first book. I've recently finished the Divergent trilogy, and am just utterly disappointed in the ending. Up until the last few chapters I was enjoying it, but then there were signs of 'bad end' appearing. It makes the sleep I gave up to read it seem wasted :'(.
  • Separation anxiety is kicking my ass.
  • Jerall has been on a work trip since Wednesday, and it's just been me with Keiden. It's gone well. He's also leaving on another trip on Sunday for a week, and Keiden and I are just staying home alone. I'm not freaked out by it, unlike the last time. I do however miss the hour of sleep I'd get in the morning when Jerall did baby stuff.
  • My usual birthday angst is hitting earlier than every - I'll be 30 in just over four months. I'm determined to do something to feel at least a little happier with myself.
  • We've had a bad month in terms of eating well. This time though, unlike other times, I'm not going to let it spiral back into crazy. I'm just going to restart.

Friday, 22 August 2014

A day

Being a mom is the hardest job I've ever had. Here is a typical weekday.

  • Wake at 02:00, K is niggly, feed and settle him back to sleep. This can take anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour. Also teething has thrown a wrench at us, and now he's waking just before midnight before this :-/
  • Wake at 04:30, more niggly K and settle.
  • Wake at 06:30, breakfast feed for K
  • Wake at 07:00, J's alarm goes off, he takes K for a bit.
  • Get up about 07:30ish, doing morning stuff before J leaves for work. On days where it's been a very bad night, I get to sleep till J leaves. Sure it makes going to the bathroom tricky, but sleep wins.
  • 08:00 and 09:00 make and feed K his solids breakfast. I do sometimes make a batch of his meals that's big enough to freeze a few portions, but because it's important to me to have him try something new every week, I can't always make and freeze ahead. Generally, this time of the morning K is pretty content to play with himself for a few minutes, so I let him. If it's a good day do some laundry.
  • 09:00 and 10:00 bf, change nappy and try to get him to nap. Try to hang laundry - if it' not too windy I put him in his bouncy chair and he stares at the trees.
  • 10:00 and 11:00 if K is napping bonus thing go faster. If he's not it's one handed breakfast making, and play. Playing always involves some form of tummy time - he hates it, but it must be done - and then variations of reading, stacking games, flying games, some dancing around and tickles :). Last attempt at hanging laundry.
  • 11:00 and 12:00 nappy change, play with K and start making his lunch
  • 12:00 and 13:00 feed K his lunch, try to get him to drink some water, entertain him.
  • 13:00 - 14:00 nappy change, bf and attempt at getting him to nap.
  • 14:00 - 15:00 lunch for me. If K is napping more e-mail and work attempts.
  • 15:00 - 16:00 nappy change, more playing. Maybe take a walk if the weather is good or we didn't go earlier. Or if I'm very lucky, he's sleeping and I can have a minute or so to myself to just arb.
  • 16:00 - 17:00 wake him at 16:00 if he's sleeping, get his supper ready, play. Maybe do dishes.
  • 17:00 - 18:00 feed him his supper, do dishes, try to waylay a cranky tired meltdown, bf.
  • 18:00 - 19:00 J gets home. I help with bath stuff, we chat. I sort out bed stuff for K and his night bottle, clean up post bath mess. Start dinner. If J is working late then I do it all.
  • 19:00 - 20:00 make dinner, have a minute to myself. Chat with J. Maybe watch something while having dinner.
  • 20:00 - 21:00 possibly watching another episode of something. If not start work.
  • 21:00 - 23:00 work
  • 23:00 onwards shower and sleep
  • 02:00, it all starts again
While breastfeeding I manage to do some chatting via hangouts/twitter/whatsapp. Also use that time to check twitter, read blogs etc. So the work thing became consistent from the start of this month, but since K was about 3 months or so I have had some form of work or the other - editing and other things.It's only recently that it became set.

Weekends are very different. J is a my hero, he'll let me sleep in for an hour or so, he and K have lot of giggles and raspberry blowing competitions. But we do make a point of being out and about, and are usually out of the house by 10:00. It gets very busy, but it helps me a lot.

Friday, 8 August 2014

Five for Friday

Another pic of Keiden, because...well because ;).

  • Something I read often in mom articles is the not getting to shower, and I don't understand that. Why not shower at night? It's tricky in the morning, so at night is best. And when? Well how about when your baby goes to sleep? Just my two cents.
  • I've realised that just as I have friends who don't know me without Jerall in my life; I'll now have friends who don't know me without Keiden.
  • It's just over five months till I turn 30 o_0.
  • I'm using an affirmation of sort, gah. Is this me becoming hippy-dippy?

Wednesday, 6 August 2014

Friday, 18 July 2014

Thursday, 17 July 2014

It all seems to be

This never ending chase. It feels like we're just chasing after the next milestone. Doing what we can to help him achieve the next thing. It's like a never ending cycle of "What comes next?" First there was the smile, then the moving on to slightly longer stretches of sleeping, then rolling and sitting, and laughter, and solids, and and and. And the one thing that is really supposed to be a big help, and normalise things - or at least remind you that you're not alone, and others wonder the same thing you do - isn't helping.

Suddenly those others parents and their babies have you questioning what you're doing, what your baby is achieving. And it's just so hard not to compare, and not to feel judged. And then you realise that it'll never end. There'll always be something...and that it needs to stop. But how do you make it stop? Not talking to others isn't going to help anybody.

Is this just another form of the constant competition that people find themselves in? It seems to me that we're all always in a form of competition. Conversations seem like areas of one-upmanship: it's either my good day is better, or my bad day is worse, or I'm so busy. Or is this just something that only I see, and I only see it because of insecurity pushing me to see how I'm not worthy because I don't do x?

Clearly I'm still grappling with the Brene Brown talk. Which is also peculating in there with a new blog find - renegade mothering; in particular this and this. Is anything I just said making sense to anyone else; or is it just another stranger thought tangent my mind takes?

Tuesday, 15 July 2014

It's all changed

Gaming as I knew has come to an enormous screeching halt. Gone are the days of 4 -6 hour long rpg sessions. Gone are the days of sitting, and hacking and slashing our way through a dungeon. Hours of creating the perfect sim for my schadenfreude moments.

It's all gone. Hopefully just for a little while. But on Sunday it hit me in a big way. I can't do a quick four hour pfs game anymore. Keiden won't be happy to play on his mat or sit on my lap and watch people anymore. When he was younger we managed to pull it off, but now it's just not going to happen.

I'm so afraid that with stopping I'll just not get back to it. But we can still pull off the occasional two hour session for home games - and aps. So there's hope.

There's more hope in that Jerall found a cute game - Divinity - that we can play together for an hour or so at night. And that's the thing, without being able to game together my real fear is that my relationships will change for the worse. Gaming together has been a big part of what Jerall and I do together for fun. It's also what we do predominantly with most of our friends.

I suppose this will be the real test of those friendships. Besides gaming will the shared food, coffee and geeky interests survive?

This part of the parenting gig is hard.

Monday, 14 July 2014

Boot camp is over...for now

The topics have become uninspiring. The one for today is "my parents", and tomorrow's one is a free. I'll be pausing boot camp until a topic grabs me. When one does, I'll do the backlog of topics. I found that the caching-up I did went far smoother than the daily writing. It could be because there's more pressure with doing a batch of posts at a time than just one. Either way writing by route is not for me.

Sunday, 13 July 2014

Saturday, 12 July 2014

Thoughts on writers boot camp

Right now I'm becoming irritated with the boot camp. One word topics, and topics that have been used in other challenges aren't really helping me to write. But, it is helping me get back into a habit of writing, and posting more often. It has though, become a form of writing by route.

Although is that a fault of the boot camp, or just my own inability to run off with the topic on an interesting or different tangent? Either way as I ponder that, I will finish it. I'm working on finishing more things, rather than starting and just leaving them.

If the posts are irritating you, just remember that they'll end at the end of the month ;).

Writers Boot Camp Day 12: What makes me laugh

  1. Lame jokes - my favourites include: How do you get a baby austronaut to sleep? You rocket. What's brown and sticky?  A brown stick.
  2. Puns - the sillier the better.
  3. Jerall - the teller of lame jokes and maker of puns.
  4. Keiden - him laughing or just doing cute baby stuff.


If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Writers Boot Camp Day 11: One food, one drink for the rest of my life

I could happily eat sushi every day for every meal.

Rooibos tea ftw! I have this mug in blue.

**I'm playing catch-up.


If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Writers Boot Camp Day 10: The best advice I ever received/heard

This topic irritates me. The best advice really? Any advice that you decide to take and use is clearly the best advice for you at that time.

Advice that I'm currently taking on board and using in some form or another:

  • Trust your instinct
  • Relax
  • Embrace the mommy guilt  - don't let it become overwhelming, but realise that you feel the guilt because you care immensely.
  • Cut out grain and sugar.

**I'm playing catch-up, life happened.


If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Wednesday, 9 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 9: Pinings

I long to read. More accurately I long to read physical  books. Reading on a device is just not the same as reading something with heft. I long to just be able to sit and read for as long as I like. I miss being able to read late - these days late seems to be 22:00. I long to not feel too tired to give a book the attention it deserves. I miss the quiet that comes when you're immersed in another world.


If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Tuesday, 8 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 8: A love letter to my pet hate

Dear random lady,

I do so love how you think it's okay to come up to me and invade my bubble of personal space to touch my baby. My baby that I'm wearing (that's carrying my baby in a wrap). It's such fun when you ignore my oft repeated "Please don't touch my baby" to just carry on reaching out your hand till I'm forced to bat it away.

Truly there is nothing I love more than answering your dumb-ass question as to why I don't want your dirty, stranger hand touching my baby. Clearly I've missed that vital study that said the best thing you can do for your baby is have a stranger touch him; especially when it means they get to invade your space too.

See you soon, germ bubble.


If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Monday, 7 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 7: Inspired by art

It's just a reminder of the days long gone. Days of reading late, fighting your eyelids as they and the book become heavier and heavier. But you must, no you need to carry on...something exciting is happening to the character...and how can you just abandon this new found friend. Read you must, if you don't the story just pauses, frozen in that one spot, at that inopportune moment. And when you do sleep it'll be dreams filled with all those tiny fascinating details that burrowed their way into your mind...to be completely explored in dreams.

If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Sunday, 6 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 6: Doors and windows

I just love unusual, and colourful doors and windows. Most of one of my boards on Pinterest has just glorious pictures of wonderful windows and doors. So this post will be pretty close to wordless. Enjoy :).


If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Saturday, 5 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 5: Find a job ad in the paper. Write about your life if you had that job.

We don't buy the newspapers often, and this week's community paper got destroyed in the rain. So I opted for the next best option - I went to Biz Community and am using the first job ad for Cape Town that I saw.

Hmmm my life as a direct account executive is crazy. For one I don't have much time during the week to see my husband or son, sometimes there aren't even weekends. The relentless push to make sales target is driving me batty. Not to mention the effect on my health - tension headaches, chest pains, backache and my weight just keeps on climbing. There's no time for good food when you're going from one coffee to the other meeting potential and current clients. On the plus side the money means my hair constantly looks good. Although I've become more materialistic -  you must dress for success.


This topic  is pretty hard. And it's clear that I don't have a very clear or good impression of what it is that account executives do besides try to get sales. It'll be very interesting reading what other people come up with.


If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Friday, 4 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 4: I just couldn't live without

Some of the blogs I read are also doing the boot camp, and most of them the answers for day three was losing their significant other. And for me that's what I just couldn't live without.

I can not picture what my life would be like without Jerall in it. Sometimes when  I'm particularly angry or grumpy with him I try to imagine him not around, and it just upsets me so much that I quickly deal with whatever lead to the anger or grump.


If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Thursday, 3 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 3: One of my greatest fears

Today's topic is pretty easy. One of my greatest fears - albeit it is a new one -  is that I will fail as a parent. I'll have failed if Keiden turns into one of those annoying males blind to the privilege that being male grants. I'll also have failed if he doesn't remember that everyone has a story/their struggles. Pretty much if we don't get it right for him to treat everyone he deals with fairly and politely then we've failed.

How will I know that we got it right; he'll treat cold calling call centre agents politely.


If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Wednesday, 2 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 2: My 5 favourite words in English (or any other language)

For some reason thinking of 5 words is throwing me for a loop, which is weird given how much I love reading. I'm just going to go with what ever pops into my head first.
  1. Daijoubu - it's more a phrase, but it is one of the few words I picked up from watching tons of anime that sticks with me, and it both asks and answers a question.
  2. Foeterasie - it's an Afrikaans word that covers a person's fondness for all the finicky details. I find that Afrikaans can be incredibly beautiful and descriptive language, and this word covers its descriptive nature wonderfully.
  3. Monkey - a pet name J and I throw around for each other, and Keiden.
  4. Yay - it's a word that can convey a lot, or t least in the way that I use it. And it's just so happy.
  5. Insidious - it was part of my preferred phrases to mutter to myself when dealing with the unpleasantness that was high school. I'd always wimp out of actually calling someone insidiously asinine, but just knowing that there were a few people I could call that, and not have them know what I was saying helped.
Looking at this list it's very clear that I am indeed a very strange fish ;).

If you want to take part in the boot camp just follow @writersbootcmp, a new topic is given every day at 18:00 SA time.

Tuesday, 1 July 2014

Writers Boot Camp Day 1

In a bid to post more often I'm following a group on twitter, @writersbootcmp that posts a daily topic for you to write about; which you need to do in 60 minutes. Day one's topic is: Even if you know me well you don't know this.

Hmmm it's a bit tricky, but I'll go for short and sweet. Even those who know me really well don't really know how hard I find social situations. I'm so good at faking it, till I make it that it's probably a big surprise to realise that I'm shy. It's a shyness that stems from insecurity...I'm not interesting/smart/funny enough for someone to want to talk/interact with me.

Monday, 30 June 2014

Catching up

  • Picture of Keiden to help ease the "It's a post" shock.
  • Bullet points...I enjoy using them.
  • Keiden's lumps were first thought to be lipoma, but they actually are a cold abscess caused by the tb vaccine.
  • The rash is a precursor to eczema, but we're getting it under control.
  • Tomorrow we start solids 0_o.
  • K is laughing so much now, it is one of the best sounds ever. Our clinic sister calls this phase the baby honeymoon, they're all super cute and interacting with the world.
  • Life has had a few bad moments; two friends passed away. One from cancer, and the other had a fatal asthma attack. Both were in their early thirties...people are not supposed to die that young.
  • The guilt ebbs and flows, but I'm starting to recognise it as part of what happens when you compare your normal to that which people present to the world.
  • Tomorrow I'm starting a post every day of July challenge, I'm hopeful that it'll get me back on track with posting.
  • My baby is five months old today...time is zooming by. 

Sunday, 4 May 2014

That overarching feeling

Going into this I thought I'd prepared myself well. I knew there'd be little to no sleep, I knew it'd be hard...but somehow in all the reading of mom blogs I'd missed the guilt part. I've felt like I've left Keiden down from day one.

It was my body that had the calcifying placenta that meant he needed out sooner. It was my body that had bad nipples that meant he didn't get lots of colostrum and had formula. It was my inability to say no let me keep on trying, that let me let a night nurse bully me into giving him formula. So naturally that post hospital discharge weight losse was my fault - it wouldn't have happened if we didn't go from formula to breast. He had nappy rash at seven weeks so clearly I messed up again.

And now, he's had a slight rash on his torso since Monday which I thought could be heat rash because we were using a very warm blanket, but it hasn't gone away - so again I screwed up. Added to that on Wednesday I felt to hard lumps near his right underarm - something I should have noticed sooner. We're seeing the paed tomorrow, but it should've been sooner.

Worse than all of that is the realisation that I'm afraid to be alone with him for longer than a work day. Jerall has to leave on a work trip on Tuesday. I've said that I want us to go stay with my aunt while he's gone because with my license-less state (another mommy failure) I couldn't take Keiden to the doc if there's an emergency. But, I've realised it's because for the entire length of Jerall's trip I wouldn't get a break, there'd only be me for everything all the time. I had no idea how much I needed the break that came from Jerall handling bath and bedtime. It feels wrong that I think I couldn't cope with Keiden on my own for 10 days, but there it is.

Somehow I seem to not do anything, but let him down. I'm the only one who can't get him to fall asleep in the bed during the day. I need to use the wrap. How do other mommies do it? Seriously, how do you do it? Please tell me. And why is it that guys don't seem to feel any of this?

Wednesday, 30 April 2014

On leaving Keiden & going out just us

It was out 5 year wedding anniversary on Friday, so on Sunday we went out just us. It was so scary leaving Keiden with someone else - even though that someone else was my aunt. Jerall had worked out that prior to that I'd only been apart from Keiden since birth for about 10 hours. He slept in my room at the hospital, and I didn't leave him in the nursery for long stretches of time; so Sunday was a big deal.

I'm pleased to say that it went well. I only called to check how he was doing twice. Going for lunch and a movie helped there as once the movie was done we went to go pick him up. My aunt says that he didn't cry and was happily chatting to everyone. On one hand it's great that he was fine, I obviously didn't want him crying the five hours we were gone, but my baby didn't miss me :(. It also brought home how very glad I am that I don't need to go back to work. If I was, it'd be happening next week 0_o.

It was great though, going out with Jerall. I got to eat messy food without worrying I'd mess on the baby. And the movie was good - we saw Captain America 2. Today, the mini one is 3 months old, there'll be a post abut that soon.

Wednesday, 2 April 2014

Two months

On Sunday Keiden was two months old. It's ridiculous how quickly we've gotten to this point. Also yay Jerall and I for keeping him alive and well for this long ;).
Things to remember: him looking for me when I talk and someone else holds him. Him smiling - his dad got the first one and he's been stingy with them ever since. I just can't get one while Jerall gets them often. His fascination with his mirror toy. We took the toy for the play mat and put it on his chair and he happily chats away. Him getting talkative, although he tends to be most chatty at night. How much more alert he's become; it's amazing to see him hit at toys and watch things and people.
Now for pictures:

Monday, 17 March 2014

The weekend that was

A short, sweet and mostly homeward bound weekend was had. Although Friday late afternoon and evening included a visit to my aunt, which means food :). She made soup and curry...it was delicious.

Saturday Keiden and I visited with L while Jerall gamed. But L and I had an excellent two player Pandemic game and some good Agricola games too. She made mmmmpie and twice baked potatoes for lunch. It was the weekend of great food, as Sunday lunch was a steak braai and Saturday super was Thai food from a new find.

All the great food aside the highlight of the weekend was Saturday. As L was holding Keiden I was talking and he turned and looked for me :D. It so made my day.

Obligatory baby picture below.

Saturday, 8 March 2014

A bit late

It's a bit after the fact, but here are some photos from our bump shoot in December. It's great to have the photos, it reminds me that it wasn't all bad. But I really don't miss those days of swollen everything and heartburn. Photos taken by Nielen, at the V & A Waterfront on a very windy day.

We might have been having a belly off :p

No idea what Jerall was trying to do.

Thursday, 27 February 2014

One month

Guys, my baby is one month old today. Ok, it's not the 30th, but February doesn't have that and it has been four weeks since he arrived. I can't believe that it's been a month already...granted I'm so tired I'm sure I've lost time somewhere.

Things to remember: the way he arches his brows when he's trying to decide to give in to sleep or not. The way his stubbornness is showing up - Keiden fights sleep all the time, hence regular eyebrow arching. And lately his mommy hold me all the time phase - I'm sure it'll end and I'll miss it.

Photos below,  posting from my phone makes it hard to have them in a post.

Tuesday, 18 February 2014

This baby business is tough

Man oh man do I miss hours of solid sleep. What makes it worse is that at night Keiden does have a long stretch of sleep. The problem is that I wake up at about the two and a half hour mark, and about every twenty minutes after that till he wakes at about the four hour mark 0_o. Clearly my body is trying to sabotage me.

Jerall does his best to help, but unless he somehow manages to grow a set of boobs there's not that much he can do besides burping and some walking to get K to sleep. I also find myself being all meh about breastfeeding. I don't hate it, but I don't like it. I could take it or leave it, but it's probably easier than a bottle&is free. The clinic nurse advised that I don't try expressing till about six weeks - it took awhile, a long while, for my milk to come in&I've had other feeding issues.

This raising a person business is tough...and it's the early, easy days 0_o. His needs right now are pretty simple. Although it doesn't stop me from wishing he came with status bars like a sim - that'd certainly make things a lot easier. The heat isn't helping matters much either; I go between worrying that he's too hot or getting cold for most of the day. Again we need status bars, someone work on science or magic to make it happen.

And now pictures of my second love :).

Thursday, 6 February 2014

One week

It'll been one week of Keiden. For those who don't follow me on Twitter you missed the news. At our weekly visit last week our doctor said that my placenta had calcified dramatically since the week before - it ment that Keiden had to out.

So we went from still having time to having none. The entire day was surreal - not to mention hungry. The visit was at 09:00, & we got a 16:00 time for the c-section so I couldn't eat. It didn't seem as if if was happening even when we got to theatre & I had to get into position for the spinal.

My part went well, just a bout of low blood pressure - so he was out quickly. He however wasn't in such a good spot. He had his cord around his neck, which doc had missed because of the placenta thing. I got to see him for a minute & then he had to go. Jerall stayed with Keiden while they were finishing off with me.

I only got to see Keiden again at 18:00, which was not great at all. But, there he was all kinds of awesome.

C-section recovery is not a walk in the park, thank goodness for drugs. And a doctor who's all manage the pain with drugs. We've been home since Sunday and it's going ok. That said Keiden's lost weight since being discharged and I still haven't had my milk come in so that's not making for a good time. All in all though I have all kinds of good cuddles ;).

The numbers: Keiden Jay born 30th January 2014, weight 2.535kg, length 48.5cm.

Monday, 27 January 2014

The weekend that was

It does seem a bit odd to me that I would be sort of getting back into blogging just as I'm going to hit the point of  falling out of it again. Anyhow, back to the short and sweet post.

Friday evening we had a braai with friends we hadn't seen in awhile. Lots of food and pudding ftw :). We also played Cards Against Humanity for the first time - it's so wrong, but so funny. It's really not a game for everyone though. Saturday was pfs at Fanaticus - I played with some new folks, all in all it was fun. Post Fanaticus we went to Canal Walk to find a rocker\comfy chair for feedings. It wasn't a successful trip.

Instead of diner at the mall we got some Steers and hired dvds. We watched This is How it Ends and Fannie Fouries Labola. The local movie was much, much better than the vanity project which was the first mentioned. I still have the chorus from one of the songs in Fannie Fouries Labola stuck in my head. Sunday was a big lazy day.

How was your weekend?

Thursday, 23 January 2014

Those resolution things

Yes, I know that January is almost done...and it seems a bit late for a resolution. Only this isn't a resolution per say, it's more of a has to happen. I've decided that 2014 is the year I make peace with my hair.

I have thick, unruly, almost curly hair. Every time I wash it it takes me about two and a half hours to flat iron it. I don't blow dry, that'll just take too long, so I make two buns and let it dry like that during the day. Then of course there'll be top up flat irons between washes so that my hair can carry on looking semi decent.

Sure making peace with my hair might not seem like a big deal, or very hard to do, but when you've grown up with lots of emphasis placed on hair it's very hard to let go of certain thoughts. The state of my hair is so important to me, that even if I'm wearing something I know I look good in, and am having a good day it won't matter because my hair isn't looking good. I worry that I'll be considered a mess because my hair is a mess. Jerall will call me beautiful and I'll shrug it off because why...my hair is a mess.

I'm hoping that with the arrival of Keiden it'll be easier to just deal with my hair. I won't be able to worry about it because I won't have time...and I'll just be too tired to deal with. Maybe I will be able to respond to my inner critic with "It doesn't matter, it's just hair."

Does the state of your hair bother you as much as mine does me?

Monday, 20 January 2014

The birthday weekend that was

Friday was a take it easy at home evening, we watched Monsters University. It was much better than the trailed had lead us to think it would be. Saturday was my birthday. I'm now in my last year of 20s 0_o. The day started early, I woke up starving at 06:30. So I had a small breakfast of cereal, but about 09:00ish we headed off to O'ways for breakfast. O'ways is probably my favourite place...it's a pity they don't do dinner, otherwise we'd probably go there a lot more often.

For lunch our friend L made mmmmmpie - it's a cheese and mushroom pie - and roast potatoes. Desert was this most amazing baked chocolate, ginger and raspberry cheesecake...all of it got demolished. I tell you having your friend making her dishes that you love just for your birthday means somewhere you've manged to do the friend thing right.

Post lunch we played board games...so it was a pretty good afternoon. Which we then topped off with sushi buffet for dinner with other friends. It was all kinds of awesome. And it was made better by my presents.

I got most spoilt with my presents. Jerall got me book three of the Mouse Guard series, and issue one of Sandman Overture. A friend gave me great bath stuff, another gave me vouchers for Exclusive Books - which I've already turned into two books :). Another gave me a Musica voucher - still to be spent. And one gave me Takealot voucher - already turned into a book and replacement copy of Love Actually [the one Jerall got me years ago broke :(]. I've also been told that another friend has a prezzie for me when we see her. See much spoilage, and the best part is it was all things for me...not baby related at all.

Yesterday there was gaming, getting books and taking it easy. How was your weekend?

Friday, 17 January 2014

Rambling update

At least not quite as many months have passed this time since my last post. I might just be getting slightly better at this ;) We're nearing the end of the baking a little person process - I at 34 weeks. However, my placenta is calcifying, and we're not going to make it to the edd of 25th Feb. Fortunately, yesterday's doctor visit had good news, we might just make 37 weeks :). This has meant that we needed to speed up our get things ready for K plan, and both our bags are packed. The rest of the things though aren't quite as sorted. We still don't have the cot here 0_o

On the non baby front I don't have much to say really. Probably because right now K is probably our number one talking point. It is the day before my birthday...I'll be 29 0_o. Last year of my 20s. Although tomorrow does mark a year of keeping a pot plant alive, woo hoo. It's been hit and miss at some moments, but the chili plant is alive. I'll get a picture of it up at some point.

Right, not much else besides the usual pre birthday emo. Which has passed so yay for that. Have a good weekend folks. Oh, also happy 2014 :0

Ps. Not quite as rambling as I though this would be.

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