Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Thoughts on grandparents

With the recent visit of his ah-ma, and just how happy seeing her made Keiden I've been pondering grandparents. And more specifically, how I limit any interaction he has with my mother.

Do you think that just as there are people who shouldn't be parents those same people shouldn't be grandparents? Are we supposed to expose our children to those we know have a greater than average chance of hurting them?

I don't see it as responsible parenting, if I knowingly put him in the ambit of someone who can be unspeakably cruel. Or is there something I'm missing.

For now, I'm glad that he has ah-ma, and a mim, who love him to bits, and get big smiles when we tell him we're going to see either of them.

What are your thoughts on this?

Monday, November 30, 2015


We have a Sunday morning breakfast tradition, we always have pancakes. I was the one who made them, before my preferred pan went wonky. After that, Jerall took over. I wonder when Keiden will take a turn.

Our tradition of Sunday morning pancakes is so ingrained in us, that even when we're away from home it happens. On our PE trip ah-he made them for us. It's a small thing that makes our family, family.

We don't have many others. Our Christmas Eve one is to get lots of yummy nibbles, and watch what we call Christmas movies. We also have some movies that we watching during the month.

And then there's bedtime story time. It's part routine, and part tradition. And it's one we all enjoy a lot.

Oh, just remembered our birthday one. For their birthdays, and birthday month the person celebrating gets to pick where we're eating out, if we do that.

What traditions have you built into your family?

Sunday, November 29, 2015


This week I'm grateful for:

  • therapy
  • family visits
  • Jerall's big interest in cooking, I didn't make dinner for a whole week :D
  • getting to just be
  • sunshine
  • hugs
  • coffee
  • friends
  • games
  • pizza
  • the internet
What is topping your list this week?

Saturday, November 28, 2015

Tis the season

To be filled with wants. And it's so easy to get lost in that feeling, of wanting, lusting, needing. We then forget what this time of year reminds us of.

And no, I'm not talking religious stuff here. I'm talking about taking stock of what we have, of being grateful. It's hard I know to not get caught up in the want of it all, but we should try.

So while we're spending time trying to find just the right way to express to those we love how much we love them, let's try to remember to be glad for to have them too.

Friday, November 27, 2015

Five for Friday

An upended tree we found in the nature reserve on our Sunday walk.

Someone couldn't resist all the rocks and stones.

Post walk coffee, at Schoon De Companje (or Oude Bank for the locals). I love the wooden saucers.

Some quirky decor at Schoon.

My scooby snakcs, I haven't had these since our trip to Canada. The aunt we stayed with was her on holiday, and she brought me these :).

Thursday, November 26, 2015

What I'm currently reading.

I'm still processing what came out of therapy. Thus, I don't have many words. So be distracted by my current reading list.

I dip in and out of each as the right mood hits. Am almost done with Furiously Happy as it's making me laugh when I need it.

What are you reading? Are you a one book at a time person, or more?

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Sometimes you just need to sit in the sun

Yesterday, was a pretty great day in parts. Jerall's auntie Jan, who we stayed with when we had our Toronto holiday is in SA for a visit. She and the mil came down to Cape Town on Monday.

Yesterday, they, us, my sil and her family all had a picnic lunch at Warwick Wine Estate. Our niece M, and Keiden had such a blast running around, and playing in the fountains. The grown-ups sat under the shade, just being it.

The gourmet picnic they offer is pricey, but well worth it. And it's a lot of good quality foods. Jerall, Keiden and I shared one, and it was more than enough - even with our eat all the food kid. Drinks are extra. Also, remember to book. And that the experience is so much more than the picnic. Sometimes, just sitting with no rush to finish at the venue you're at makes it all just perfect.

And it turns out it was just what I needed after an intense morning at therapy. All the feelings and things come out when I go to a session tired. More on that another time.

If you're stay-cationing in Cape Town and the surrounds, Warwick is a lovely spot to just sit in the sun.

The winner of the Book Owl giveaway is...Cindy. Yay. I'll be e-mailing you soon.

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Monday, November 23, 2015

This might just be one of my odder ideas

On Friday, I had the strangest thought. I wondered what if I blogged every day for a year. Then panic and fear set in. Why would I want to do that to myself? Could I even pull it off? Am I just being swayed by the fact that my NaBloWriMo seems to be going well?

So yes, just when it seems that everyone else is pulling away from blogging. I'm deciding to dive-in in the deep end, which is all kinds of ridiculous given I can't swim.

I've chatted to some friends about it, and I figure the best way to do this is in smaller pieces. I know I can do a month of it. So I'll be taking it a month at a time. And I need to remember to be kind to myself while doing this. That means scheduling posts ahead when I have the urge to write everything, and to not be hard on myself if I miss a day due to sickness. I am hoping though that the scheduling ahead, when I have the write all the things urge will help avoid those moments.

I've realised that what I will get from doing this, is a sense of accomplishment - finishing a big-ish year long project would be good for me to know that I can do it. Also, much as I call this my space, and say I should write for myself, I think writing everyday for a year will help me feel more as if this is my space where I write for myself.

The thing with blogging is that although it is self driven you are aware of an implied audience. And as such I know that I unknowingly started not writing about all my interests. Which is all kinds of ridiculous. This way, with the expectation of putting up something everyday I won't be able to shy away from all that makes me me.

It should translate into more gaming talk, and as my diploma course starts next year probably some more academic discourse. Guys, I have so many thoughts and ideas on gender, identity and the performance/performative nature bouncing around in my head, in e-mails, chats and notes that I have no idea why it isn't here. So here it will be.

What do you think?

Sunday, November 22, 2015

An attitude of gratitiude

I'm working on my attitude of gratitude, so this I think will become a regular thing for Sundays. And probably on those days when I just need to be more aware of what I have instead of focusing on what I don't have.

I'm grateful for Jerall. Especially, because we had some ugh moments recently...we're past those. But nothing like a bad moment to remind just how good things normally are.

Keiden. Yes, he is pushing so many buttons, but those love yous and hugs help. Not to forget that I'm glad that he feels safe, secure and loved enough to push his boundaries without fear of losing us. I am so glad that he feels secure in our love for him.

Friends. Ones who get my particular brand of quirk. Renewing relationships with those from before, and those who are close enough for random tea visits.

The work that I do have. My client is fortunately someone who doesn't care too much when the work happens, just as long as it happens. It is such a great thing to have when working from home with a toddler.

That Keiden got into our preferred play school. That we can send him to it.

Twitter, it helps me not be surrounded in an echo chamber that confirms my confirmation bias.

That I'm open to looking at different points of views.

Amazing online retailers that help make my life easier.

Opportunities coming my way.

Coffee, the lifeblood of parents.
Any moments of gratitude for you recently? How do you maintain an attitude of gratitude?